19 December 2007

Resentment

Baby cried, I woke up. Its six in the morning and I saw him still at the desk. He is always playing his game till dawn before he goes to bed. It makes me feel that all he cares is the game. I always sleep alone, and that makes me feel kind of lonely. I told him, but he don't care. Now, where's my husband? He don't want to do anything else but play his game.

"Can you sleep or not?" I asked. He said okok, and slept beside me, sticking to me, wanting to hug me. I pushed him away, and tell him to sleep further away, but he refused. Finally, I told him to go away or else I can't sleep because I am too angry. He asked me why, and my reply was: "you wouldn't understand even if I tell you". He turned away from me. I have a husband who doesn't sleep with me because all he wants is to play his game. I really should mock at myself. He might as well marry a game and not me. He doesn't know what I want actually. Every night, I wish that I can have him by my side, talk to me till we fell asleep, but that is a tall order, or should I say it is a never-will-happen reality. His happiness, his every day life, his temper all evolve around the game, he would throw his temper at the mouse or even me if there is a problem with the game.

What does he even treat me as? I am a resentful and lonely wife, does he know that? He would rather play his game than accompany me. I asked him to take me to the mall tomorrow and it seems to be a torture to him, because he can't play his game.

A simple wish, a simple life, I don't ask for much, but he never get it.

4 comments:

Gloria said...

Once they start playing games, especially MMORPG, they are ALL like that. And it gets worse when they get deeper into the game. If he can't practise self-control then he needs to quit playing it altogether.

zcatz said...

I don't mind him playing his game, but I expect there should be some respect given to me. When it's time to sleep, you should go to bed; when its time to go out, you don't hang on to the game, unable to pluck yourself out!

Mrs. Lee said...

need to sit him down.. and realli TALK. not fight or scream. TALK. tell him exactly how you feel and how impt his role in ur life is. dun let things get worse than it already is.. a marriage needs maintanence.. and constant dating!

zcatz said...

Constant dating is a nice idea, but I think he dates his game more than he dates me. Haha, that is so sad.