24 February 2008

Postpartum Depression

You’ve just had a baby, one of the most important and happiest events in your life. "What could make a woman happier than a new baby?" you wonder. So why are you so sad? If you experience postpartum depression, you may worry about the baby's health and well-being. You may have negative thoughts about the baby and fears of the baby coming to harm.

While in the hospital, baby Dylan was diagnosed with thyroid problems and have G6PD deficiency. Having not heard of these weird medical terms, my heart felt wrenched when the paediatrician told me of what my baby is suffering. During this 1st week, my baby cannot be discharged from the hospital, because it is the regulation that babies born with G6PD deficiency has to stay in the hospital for at least a week to observe their jaundice level, so as when any life threatening incidents happen, doctors can save your babies in time, I guess so.

Two days after the birth of my darling, I was discharged from the hospital without my baby with me. This issue alone makes me so sad, and had made me teared a few times. I had no idea why tears can come so easily, just a mere thought of my baby can make me fill a pail of tears, and to the addition of the thyroid problems, I had to admit that I almost cried myself to sleep every night. During the days when he's in the hospital, I had to pump milk from my breasts regularly so that I can give my milk to the nurses to feed my baby. Because I couldn't stay in the hospital 24/7, nurses have to supplement formula milk. It was hard work, I didn't know how to pump milk myself, luckily boy was a great help.

Boy was very supportive during this whole period, he comforted me a lot, talking to me about the baby's problems and gave me supportive hugs, telling me we will soon ride over the problems. The comfort words he said also drive me to tears. However sometimes I really hate it when he's tired and uses a reprimandingly tone to ask me to stop crying, saying things like: "HEY, dry your tears, you are not suppose to cry!" My family was very supportive also, and that really gives me strength.

Luckily, all these are over now. The postpartum depresson soon ended when my baby was discharged from the hospital, I felt safer and at ease to be able to see my baby Dylan all the time. Both of us started learning: I learnt to breastfeed and he learnt to feed. During this period, I developed very sore nipples, this is because your nipples couldn't adjust to constant suckling. I thought to myself that total breastfeeding is no easy feat afterall.

After a month, everything goes well. Breastfeeding became the most easiest thing to do when both baby and I had adjusted to each other. I also enjoyed my baby's company, his recovery from his jaundice also put me at ease after his 1st month. Boy and I had also come to terms that baby Dylan had to take thyroid medicine for the rest of his life, to supplement the deficiency of thyroxine, and the regular checkup visits to hospital.

To me, taking care of my baby is now a breeze after I had learnt all the necessary things like bathing, feeding, changing nappies, taking him out, and most importantly, know what he wants when he throw tantrums and cry. I love the new respnsibilities entitled to me to take care of this new life. Every sound, coo and laughter that comes from him really makes me melt, I had fell in love with baby Dylan so much, and now kissing him is my new hobby.

Afterall, the pregnancy, the pain from delivery, and the depression are all worth it, but of course not the excess baggage of tummy fats I had put on.

2 comments:

Mrs. Lee said...

this is a very touching post. baby dylan is very very fortunate to have a mummy like u. dun brood over baby dylan's thyroid issues.. many babies haf asthma and other food allergies too.. everyone's body is different.. no doubt, baby dylan will grow up a good and healthy baby under all ur tender loving care! :)

zcatz said...

Thanks. =)