Sarcastic remarks

I felt so great so great today because my sore throat returned after it recovered barely a week ago, and the flu is back too I had to blow my nose every 15 minutes. Boy finally has his off day today and I naively think that he will be a great husband, maybe to pick Dylan at the childcare while he waits for me to knock off. With all these beautiful thoughts, I became very happy when he did not do any of those I thought.

So home I was, I was delighted when he refused to lift a finger to help me with Dylan while I do the laundry. Even when I asked if he could help, he merely stated he was halfway through his game and is very busy with the game that he cannot help his son at all, but found out that he can actually pause the game. A simple theory, he is a very helpful husband.

He was home all day and I am so glad I came home to find the dishes not done, really so grateful that the dishes are left for me to do after a day at work while he idle at home very occupied playing his game, so busy that he have to tell me he is not free to do anything else. The level of maturity I see from him is very high, I must agree that self centredness is his strength.

With or without the man in the house, I still have to do everything by myself. Where is my support in the family? His rest day is to rest, but why isn’t my rest day a rest day too. The responsibilities in the house all lies on me while somebody else is happy with his work and leisure.

When I wasn’t at work in the past, it is natural that I take care of housework and babysitting, and I naively thought that he will help me out when I got a job. But things didn't happen the way I thought it will be, what I shoulder in the past is still on my shoulder and plus working in the day, I find myself a very busy woman. Busy with what? Work, house and Dylan.

I thought back to myself, if I hadn’t got married at an age so young, probably I wouldn’t land myself in such a hateful and helpless situation. The treatment is intolerable and I cannot accept it anyhow. This is not the kind of marriage life that I had looked forward so much before my status was still single. The husband I used to believe I will marry is somebody able to share my burden, share my worries, share the housework, share any sufferings or joy together.

He said I shouldn’t compare him with any other man. But I wasn’t comparing, what I stated is merely a basic need, a basic criteria of what is expected of a husband. Guys out there, if you can’t share burden with your wife, or to put your family in the first place, do not ever get married. And ladies out there, make sure the man you want to marry is of an acceptable level, do not hope that your man will change for the better because this will never happen.

He must be a very happy man because he married a woman worthy of a maid’s value. He had got himself a maid while I had got myself a job, which is so called my marriage. My job is to earn money to pay the childcare, do all the housework in the house, do all the laundry, do babysitting, to feed, to clothe, to bathe, to coax, to company. Sorry but I cannot find his existence in the family.

I feel unjustified and am really tired.